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The Latest from GirlsChase. How to Hook Girls In, Pt. Get Unlimited Access Today! Wow, Freud really did women a big favor by his bias research on sex. Everything you have expressed shows how much you are brainwashed by a male dominated society. What a bunch of nonsense. I personally am sick and tired of women like you promoting sex as love. Men throughout history have NEVER been held accountable for their lack of sexual control and their objectifying of women sexually.
Your article supports male dominance over women. Marriage was created by the human society to protect and honor the family unit, specifically the children and their mothers because women are very vulnerable when they produce children, even from their own husbands.
Before there was birth control, men were allowed to kill their wives through child birth because men cared more about having sex than the life of their wife, and mother of their children. These days and in the USA, a man who will not leave his wife alone and makes her pregnant after already giving birth to a child and a doctor tells him if she gets pregnant it puts her life in danger and she will die if she has another child That man should be put in jail for murder.
No excuse for such irresponsible behavior. Birth control does not make it ok for a man to sexually dominate a woman. Men are the ones who invented religions, governments, and controlled the development of social cultures to the advantage of the human male. Just because a man has a strong sex drive does not give them the right to expect a women be responsible for his lack of self-control. For you to even suggest that a woman is doing her husband a favor by having sex with him when she does not feel up to it, promoting what has been promoted to women for thousands of years.
It is her fault if her husband is not satisfied with sex and looks for it else where. It is not a women's "duty" to manage a man's sex drive, it is the man's responsibility.
People have forgotten this about history Birth control does not always prevent pregnancies. In the case of an unwanted pregnancy, I witnessed other women being publicly shamed for the decision they make about it, and NOTHING is said or done to the men who took part in the unwanted pregnancy.
During sex, I have felt pressure to make artificial faces and noises and fake orgasms in order to turn my partner on and make them feel good about their sexual prowess. If I show any emotion, I risk being used as evidence that women are over emotional, manipulative, irrational, always playing the victim.
If I am experiencing physical or emotional health issues related to my reproductive system, I risk being used as evidence that women are irrational, and unable to make good decisions for myself and others. I agree with the majority of what you have written regarding the history of men, women and sex and it's fab that you are so passionate about women and equality.
I'm sorry but I do disagree with the tone used. It does sound a bit ranty, angry and accusatory which will automatically make a lot of men defensive and therefore ignore the important message you want to get across.
Men have a hard time too you know. They just have different problems then we do. You only need to look at the stats of male suicides to see that many are suffering. You mentioned 'if I cry We aren't expected to bottle it up. I think roles have changed so much that neither sex really know what they're supposed to be doing now. What their purpose is etc I'm certainly not advocating we go back to the 50s but it's just taking us all a while to work out how we fit together no pun intended.
We have more complicated anatomy down there and for a lot of men they're terrified they haven't got a clue what they're doing. The noises are just to guide them in the right direction. My personal experience is most men want to pleasure women. They get off when we get off,. Marriage used to provide access to sex. Now it provides access to celibacy", which commented on your sentiment as follows:. Under these conditions, pity the poor married man hoping to get a bit of comfort from the wife at day's end.
He must somehow seduce a woman who is economically independent of him, bone tired, philosophically disinclined to have sex unless she is jolly well in the mood, numbingly familiar with his every sexual maneuver, and still doing a slow burn over his failure to wipe down the countertops and fold the dish towel after cooking the kids' dinner. He can hardly be blamed for opting instead to check his e-mail, catch a few minutes of SportsCenter, and call it a night.
She's a wry and insightful writer about sex and I've enjoyed her work for years. Thanks for adding this! We have here, YOU, hearing what you want to hear based on your own obviously painful whatever and your agenda is to be heard. Create a new article then. That CAN include sex. Simple to get but you missed it. Sex can be a way to make love, but it isn't always. I assume you have heard of a strip club and such, and in that aspect I agree with you. But sex in gods mind IS a way to show a strong bond and loving relationship between two people.
Many take that for granted, but love is love. I'm sure many parents can disagree on that opinion. Laurie, I don't know why I got the impression that your writing about men's desire was so much more spontaneous and enjoyable for you, compared to the perfunctory job you have done here for women.
The men'd writeup was so eloquent and expressive and empathic, whereas there is very little or nothing here that hasn't already been hashed to death, and your level of empathy seems lower.
I wonder if I am misreading a difference in your level of enthusiasm in writing these two pieces because I am male, but I think it goes beyond my perception. Thanks for the compliments on the first blog. I probably do think men as do women who are really sexual - the "slut" get a bad rap for having sex as a primary love language. I see that a lot in practice and wanted to present to women, primarily, another way of looking at it.
On this one, I think men take lower not low, necessarily desire of their partner too personally. I wanted to take the pressure off the women - that the should feel as much desire as their guy I want women to know it's normal to be distracted and that they need time to settle into the moment and not feel guilty that they are not as "fast" as he is I guess I feel passionate about representing both sides Laurie, thanks for the nice response.
I think your article on men read better because it was among the few that counter the current trope of women's sexuality as normative and men's as deviant. I don't think I take lack of a partner's desire "personally" but, given men today must understand "no" as "no", it means the more sensitive men can rightfully feel themselves as deviant. Luckily my partner was mature enough that at some point we could agree that evolution has lent us a raw hand and went celibate. Over the years I have learned that I can get close to climax on good music and desert the latter in moderation.
Have zero need for ' self help' artists, no one has life experience without the life experience Op You are a man? Well, your expectations of Laurie are unrealistic. Normally her first support " IS" going to go to females. Don't expect her to be a traitor or ask her to betray her gender. I haven't seen you write to men who slam women about sex. Why don't you start there and leave Laurie be.
Let her do her rightful job!! I think the most striking aspect about this piece is that the biggest part of the experience for women is missing: I do not know one single woman, not one, who thinks of herself as beautiful and desirable. Every woman contends daily with the vast discrepancy between how her body looks, and how it should look. Everyone agonizes over too small breasts or too round thighs, too short legs, scars and blemishes on their skin, this one hates her wobbly knees, this one has ugly feet etc.
Sex is therefore an incredibly high-stress event where she fears to be "found out" as not being desirable - she turns the light down, avoids positions that show her "ugly side", avoids to take the bra off that prevents the ugly sagging, tenses up when he touches her tummy or butt or whatever she feels especially bad about.
All the time she is watching herself through his eyes and fearing the experience is disappointing for him. Add to that the deep shame of having a natural body that sweats, sprouts hair, farts, develops calluses etc. So add hours of additional work a week of shaving, washing, exfoliating, lotioning, perfuming, grooming, and painting. It can be pretty daunting after a long day at work and a hard "third shift" in the evening at home when the kids are in bed, the kitchen is clean, and you finally sit down after 15, 16 hours, but now he indicates he might be interested in sex - so you get up again to wash and dry your hair, shower, shave, brush your teeth, reapply some makeup to be ready A third level of shame, in the context of marriage, for many women, comes from childbirth.
A lot of women are never "the same" again, suffering tears and cuts that leave ugly scars and lingering pain, damage to the pelvic floor, stress incontinence, prolapse, etc. Wow, you should be writing an article, you're absolutely right. And even now a married mother of two over 40, I recall feeling just as uncomfortable about my body at It's funny, enjoying sex? So much of that depends on your partner, and so many women have horrific partners. When women have such negative perceptions of their own body.
I hear and read about this experience, and I feel sorry for them. I count myself very lucky and maybe in the minority to never have experienced such negativity about my body. I have always loved my body, it has served me well over the years. At age 59 now, I still love it as I did when younger. I avoided conversations centered on negative body images with other women, I simply would not participate.
I always enjoyed sex when I was younger and did not experience what Maria did. I felt desirable and wanted, and today, in my mature years, fell great about it all. So here is one women who has a lifetime of positive body images and sexual experiences.
I know there must be others out there too. Perhaps experiences run a bell curve distribution, with some outliers. Thanks for being truthful and sincere. North America needs more woman like yourself to express the positive side about their bodies and experiences. Life is beautiful as are all woman. Its in the eye of the beholder amongst other things. This is exactly it!
The shame element is so true! Society has unrealistic expectations of what being ladylike means. It's so important for her to turn off the way she downregulates the experience with her critical eye, her assumption for rejection.
I love everything you wrote -thank you Maria for sharing this! Sarcasm aside, this is a LOT of psychic work. Whether you want to do it is up to your own personal calculus, but I wilt in exhaustion knowing that this work is required to maintain a "decent relationship.
Why do people always get upset when therapists offer brief advice or a known truth, as if they are supposed to reveal the mysteries of the world to you to solve all your problems for you in one comment or a few paragraphs? Everyone, including therapists, is on this journey and everyone has to explore whatever the truth or reality means to them. No need to be nasty because it's hard. If the advice doesn't apply to you and you want better advice tailored to your situation, hire the therapist instead of complaining you didn't get free advice that fit your situation perfectly.
Using something we men call logic how does that square with the obvious needs for men to have sex regardless of blemishes, stretch marks etc. Most women are used to guys perpetually trying to hit on them and most of us couldn't care less about supposed imperfections - we're just grateful the bedroom door was opened! If we reverse the situation and look at men, I do not see any men complaining in the media that being unemployed and thus undesirable is a massive social injustice.
We just tolerate and accept it as part and parcel of existence. The is also a billion dollar beauty industry aimed at women to make them feel bad about themselves so they will buy product. As I commented earlier, I have not experienced negative body images. Not all women do and we should not perpetuate that. I think increasingly many men feel the same way. If you aren't tall, fit, chiseled l, hung and hairless except on the top where you are either perfectly coiffed or "good Bald" you increasingly feel like a troll.
Guys are increasingly every bit as body dysmorphic as women So imagine what it does when your partner seems at best lukewarm to your attention? And imagine reading articles that "prove" that most women don't find most men attractive physically, but have more nuanced attraction such that eventually the sweet funny ugly guy seems ok? If so it's a shame really The biggest "winners" here may be the small?
Society has pretty much messed us all up regarding our sexuality. I understand that one of the top google searches is related to penis size. The majority of men worry about how they measure up. Where do we get our crazy ideas? So wrong you are. Women's insecurities and girls too for that matter, are not a part of their own making.
We were tight this. Women just followed along with the standards that men set from their carnally insatiable minds. The concept of a girl or a woman's body supposing to be flawlessly beautiful began a long time ago and men have pushed this on us with a vengeance, then some women thought that this was right and so followed it. If you notice women eagerly scold other women who don't accept or use the beauty treatments and wear the sexy, revealing, and stylish clothing that the man controlled fashion industry created for us.
Women really can be the weaker more gullible gender. Look at us on internet videos teaching gullible litttle girls to make her body over for men's gaze and satisfaction. We should say enough is enough!
I read this article and kept saying, "Thank You! I new I wasn't crazy about what I need! The mental stimulation can and has gotten me into situations that are misleading- mistaking mental stimulation for love. I have tried to explain how the slightest worry can be a turn off or block me from sexual desire. For me, it may have nothing to do with how physically attractive a person is, but everything to do with 'how desired I think I will feel' during the sex.
Testosterone is a focuser. Without as much of it, most women need to find ways to turn off the distractions, shame, etc. Men always want sex, right? There are several reasons why he may not want it. Sex in menopause can mean more than just a physical change. Back Find a Therapist. Lessons You Won't Learn In School Here are 10 skills that will clarify your visions and bring you closer to your life goals.
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WHAT IS NSA FUN CRAIGSLISTESCORT SYDNEYUnlimited access to GirlsChase. The mental stimulation can and has gotten me into situations that are misleading- mistaking mental stimulation for love. Free sex hook up sites have casual sex Perth desire Submitted by Katherine on September 7, - Emotional intimacy combined with sexual intimacy is the combination that creates a passionate marriage or partnership. The men'd writeup was so eloquent and expressive and empathic, whereas there is very little or nothing here that hasn't already been hashed to death, and your level of empathy seems lower. Thanks for adding this! I'd like to please you and make you happy. 17 Sep I'm so glad that we're becoming more open about sex as a culture, but there's still a long way to go. There are lots of things that still put people. Many women find sex to be the deepest form of love and connection, and many women are very sexually oriented. While his orgasm may be quicker, hers is. 29 Apr What are the signs that she wants to have sex? You look forward to the dates, you like what she has to say, you love to hear her laugh and you're and sex experts, give you the courage to talk about sex with your new girl.
: Girls who just want sex girls who love sex
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|CRAIGSLISTCASUALENCOUNTERS W4M SERVICES PERTH||There is a power struggle in marriage over how much closeness and how much autonomy we can arrange and tolerate. Both sexes suffered in old times. All i hear is women this women. Thank you for the comment and the read! My point is yes there are guys who come home from work yell tuna casserole then start screaming and swinging, but there are far more many men that if a woman would be in danger would risk their lives to save and protect. We are all different, we all have different needs, wants and desires just like men!|
|Girls who just want sex girls who love sex||If I am experiencing physical or emotional health issues related to my reproductive system, I risk being used as evidence that women are irrational, and unable to make good decisions for myself and. Foreplay - Radio Sex Therapy Podcast. I probably do think men as do women who are really sexual - the "slut" get a bad rap for having sex as a primary love language. I find the sexism Submitted by Clara on November 17, - The Latest from GirlsChase.|